Pfff if your 20 kuribohs was art oriented I'd totally get in on that awsm - cute banner by the way, Hane Kuriboh is <3
ANYWAYS.
This has to be the most dramatic sick!fic I've ever read - they're usually super cutesy-fluffy. XD; Character-wise, I think you got Juudai pretty spot-on, Kenzan was too little to tell, but he seems fine, and Sho, hm. Sometimes his dialogue didn't sound like him. :C I always felt that that even in the subs their dialogue was fairly casual. I know he's showing his possessive side, but wowzers. Maybe I'm just biased for adorably angry, pouty Sho who's sort of a crybaby and is more sad than angry (annoyed?) when his aniki doesn't pay attention to him. It's just kiiinda...psychopathic (unless that's the point and I'm missing it dfjgfkjfd)? Tone it down a little and it'd be fine though, I know it doesn't have to be cute or anything, but yeah. And I liked the "probiotics part", haha~. XD Also Zombie Bake-Off. xD
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Date: 2010-08-30 09:34 am (UTC)ANYWAYS.
This has to be the most dramatic sick!fic I've ever read - they're usually super cutesy-fluffy. XD;
Character-wise, I think you got Juudai pretty spot-on, Kenzan was too little to tell, but he seems fine, and Sho, hm.
Sometimes his dialogue didn't sound like him. :C I always felt that that even in the subs their dialogue was fairly casual. I know he's showing his possessive side, but wowzers. Maybe I'm just biased for adorably angry, pouty Sho who's sort of a crybaby and is more sad than angry (annoyed?) when his aniki doesn't pay attention to him. It's just kiiinda...psychopathic (unless that's the point and I'm missing it dfjgfkjfd)? Tone it down a little and it'd be fine though, I know it doesn't have to be cute or anything, but yeah.
And I liked the "probiotics part", haha~. XD Also Zombie Bake-Off. xD
All in all, a good fic! Gonna be writing more? :D